30
Aug
Esquire Theme by Matthew Buchanan
Social icons by Tim van Damme
28
Aug
(via fangsx)
fuck yeah.
18
Jul
oh my god! how chubby are those cheeks…kills me!
12
Jul
“Swing me high, to bring me low. I don’t know how far to go”
Monday midday calls for jazz vocal uploads.
03
Jul
It’s a smokescreen. The Twilight films are as bland and conformist as an episode of The OC. Bella, Edward and their moon-faced cohorts are not characters, they’re hollow ciphers. Robert Pattinson can’t even manage facial expressions. He’s a blank head, a void space, a balloon with a quiff.
How have so many cynical-by-nature British kids fallen for this clean-cut bilge? The whole thing’s so emo, so profoundly American. The protagonists are supposedly “outcasts”, although you’d never guess from their gleaming smiles and bulging pecs. They certainly don’t act like any teenagers I’ve ever seen.
They don’t really do anything, in fact, they just talk about how they feel. Endlessly. They’re not even proper goths. For most of New Moon, the blokes sit around with their shirts off, flexing their abs, like male models who got lost on their way back from a Dolce & Gabbana ad audition.
27
Jun
You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
Steve Jobs
Exerts from Stanford Class of 2005’s Commencement Speech.
xxx
16
Jun
I’m thirty one floors up in one of the nicest hotels in Tokyo.
I’m usually higher than this; in many respects.
But lately I just feel like I’m falling.
Falling over my own feet; tripping and tumbling through days.
Falling for someone with my heart out on my sleeve for everyone to see, as rudely obvious as a Grandma knitted Christmas sweater.
Falling into an Alice in Wonderlandesque rabbit hole; but the other end is not full of Disney creations and acid trip friendly pastel colours.
And just when I need to fall asleep, it seems there’s one kind of falling I cannot do.
I see question marks everywhere I look and when I close my eyes, I don’t see answers.
I do seem to have a rabbit with a watch clock chasing me around my nightmare reminding me constantly that I’m late, that I’m very late for something important.
Except in my mind he says it with a far less comical tone in his voice. I believe it sounds more like “Sort your life out, you shit cunt”
I ran away from a life I was happy with straight out into Uncertainty Street and I think somewhere along the lines it turned into Misery Lane. I didn’t even see it coming. I swear it wasn’t on the map.
I keep begging that I’ll wake up, that I’ll open my eyes and I’ll be back where I started before I began running. I’ll wake up back when I was certain of everything, anything, something… and this will all be a bad dream.
I’ve always been so happy to keep running away. I’ve always done it so well.
Maybe because I’ve never left anything behind before.
But every night when I try to sleep I find myself reeling; pictures of all the things I need to do and all the things I no longer have dance in my head to remind me that it was all my fault. If I could just get back to the way it was I’d take your hand and walk you down to Remorse Town and show you just how fucking sorry I am.